“Find something you love to do, and you'll never work a day in your life.”

This is a quote that military spouse and entrepreneur, Alexa Smith, the founder of Stroller Strong Moms, LLC, in Columbus, GA and Savannah, GA, has taken to heart. This mother of three is a proud Army wife to her husband, Tony, and a current resident of Savannah, GA. 

As a certified group fitness instructor through the American Council on Exercise, she has utilized her talents and love of fitness and personal training to catapult a career formed out of passion, with the intent to lead others to a more healthy and active lifestyle. In the words of Alexa, “It’s a butt kicking program will help you get strong, lean, energized, and look awesome!” 

Growing up, Alexa was a swimmer and soccer player, playing Division I soccer at the University of Connecticut. After college, Alexa played professionally for two years in the first-ever pro league, the Women’s United Soccer Association.

After getting married, Alexa stayed active in the world of soccer through coaching for Columbus State University Women’s Soccer and a number of youth teams in Georgia and Colorado.

Like many busy moms, starting a family and having a career became a balancing act. Her growing family made it more difficult to coach, but, Alexa was determined to explore the prospect of harnessing her expertise to help others, while awarding herself the opportunity to include her children in this new adventure.  The Stroller Strong Moms program is geared toward new moms, mainly stay-at-home moms, with a goal of losing baby weight, meeting new people, entertaining their children (it is not uncommon for sing-alongs to occur) and to basically adopt a more active lifestyle. The unavoidable sense of camaraderie is evident; the common thread of pushing each other, pushing themselves, and the sense of community from being in similar situations with children and fitness goals, are the ties that bind these ladies together.  

Whether you are exploring the possibility of starting your own business, trying to find a direction in this military wife life, or you just want to know more about Stroller Strong Moms, you will be happy to know, we have picked Alexa’s brain regarding her journey into the world of entrepreneurship.

1. How did you get started with Stroller Strong Moms?

Once I had my first child, I wanted to find a workout I could do with my baby. I loved running with my jogging stroller and weight training so I wanted to do something that combined the two. We lived in Hawaii and I came upon Stroller Strides, a nationally recognized stroller fitness franchise. I started attending and I liked it so much, I became an instructor a few weeks later. I felt like it was what I was meant to do. A few months later, our family moved to Columbus, GA. As soon as we got to Columbus, I looked up Stroller Strides, but there wasn’t one in the Columbus area. At that point, I decided to start my own business. I decided to name it Stroller Strong Moms because I wanted the name to reflect the fact that moms are strong and moms can work hard to reach health and fitness goals. I built a website and created a Facebook page and had a grand opening on September 12, 2011. Less than a year later, I moved to Savannah. I trained and hired four instructors to continue Stroller Strong Moms in Columbus as a started a new class in Savannah in September of 2012. This fall, I will come up on the three year anniversary of SSM Columbus and the two year anniversary of SSM Savannah!

2. Is this your first business? 

Yes.

3. How did you finance your business and what was the process like?

I did not finance my business. There were little to no start-up costs because I use public parks for class.

4. How many employees do you have? Full-or Part time? How many Members do you have?

I have nine independent contractors who work for me as instructors (five in Columbus and four in Savannah).  I have about 150 members.

5. Describe your customer - current and potential.

My customer is the hard working, goal oriented, and fitness-minded mom who values health and fitness. She understands the importance of setting a good example for her children of the importance of exercise and a healthy lifestyle. She loves a challenge and strives to reach new fitness goals.

6. What are the most crucial things you have done to grow your business?

The most crucial thing I have done to grow my business was to add locations and classes. In Columbus, I added a new location on the other side of town and in Savannah, I added two new locations in neighboring towns. This helped to bring more members into Stroller Strong Moms.

7. What plans do you have for expansion?

I am working on expanding Stroller Strong Moms into other states as instructors and members of Stroller Strong Moms move away from Columbus and Savannah. It breaks my heart when moms move to new places where stroller fitness classes are not offered. Stroller Strong Moms becomes such a part of moms and their daily routine that when it is gone, something is missing. There is so much more to it than a workout; there are lasting friendships that form not just with the moms but with the children. I would love to provide them an opportunity to establish a new community of like-minded moms who are ready to work-out and hangout.

8. What was your biggest challenge you have had with your business?

The biggest challenge I have had with my business is the business side of things. I do not consider myself a business woman, I am just a fitness-minded mom who enjoys   watching moms reach a level of fitness they never thought they could reach.

9. What has been your most effective marketing tactic or technique?

My most effective marketing tactic was to advertise on the local websites that provide resources for moms. 

10. What three pieces of advice would you offer entrepreneurs starting out?

A piece of advice I would offer to entrepreneurs would be to make sure you start a business doing something that you are passionate about, but at the same time something that challenges you. My second piece of advice would be to be patient. It took me about a year in both locations to reach my goal of having a very successful business. My third piece of advice would be to have a sense of humor about it, because you will make silly mistakes and there will be lots of hiccups, but as long as you are having fun, everything is going to be alright.

In addition to all the obvious health and wellness benefits, it is extremely important to highlight the enormous community involvement and outreach, in which Alexa and the entire organization participate. From fundraiser races to local charity collection donations, the goals of the group far surpass simply the health aspect.

The unique talents surrounding us, in this military community, are endless.  While it seems we are limited to our current locations, situations and set of circumstances, we all have the power to turn our dreams, passions and ambitions in to a career and source of income. The road to success will, more often than not, seem like a bumpy ride. One of the most helpful things to do is find a mentor. Find a spouse who was once in your position . . . just a person with a dream. Pick their brain. Ask questions. Keep learning. And then, go for it.

And, once you do, let us know, so we can tell your story.

To learn more about Alexa Smith and Stroller Strong Moms, visit:

www.strollerstrongmoms.com and “Like” the Facebook page!

https://www.facebook.com/strollerstrongmoms

Each year, some 300,000 service members and their families PCS from one duty station to another. We’ve all done it, some more than others. And after a few times of prepping all your stuff to be packed, dutifully watching the movers box it up and load the truck, and then watching that truck drive away with your precious belongings, you think you’ve got it down. You think you’ve seen it all.

Until you have the move from the hell. Or, the move that’s worse than the move from hell you had a few years ago.

Last year, while my husband was deployed to Afghanistan, I navigated a complicated move from Stuttgart, Germany, to Toronto, Canada. By the time he got home, the car and the household goods were gone, travel plans were finalized, out-processing was mostly completed and travel reservations had been made.

Who in the U.S. military moves from Germany to Canada, right? There is no standing contract with any moving companies like there is in the states, so one had to be put out to bid. There is no local U.S. base for support, so my husband had to personally go to customs in Toronto to clear our shipments before they could be delivered.

We had so many questions about schools and housing and all the things that come with a move, but we figured it out like we all eventually do.

Then, a year later, we did a U-turn - right back to Stuttgart. This was when things got really tricky. I mean, who in the U.S. military moves from Canada to Germany?

As excited as we were to return to Europe, we knew it would be logistically difficult. So as soon as we heard the news, we contacted the U.S. Air Force base in Massachusetts that would set up our move.

Of course nothing happens without orders, and when those finally arrived we were on a tight timeline.

Once again, contracts had to be put out to bid. We had to figure out where would be the best place to drop off our car for shipment and who would issue our plane tickets and who would do our overseas medical screening and HOW IN THE HELL WERE WE GOING TO GET THIS ALL DONE IN LESS THAN TWO MONTHS?

We are not newbies at this. I’ve been married to the military for almost 24 years, and this was our eleventh PCS (and seventh outside of the continental U.S.).

But I’m pretty sure the past four months have taken at least four years off the life of my liver, due to all the alcohol consumed late at night while stewing over dates and shipments and deadlines.

We had to drive to Ft. Drum, N.Y., four hours away, to get our overseas medical screening done. Then we drove nine hours to drop off our car in Baltimore.

We were notified of our pack-out date two days ahead of time. It took the movers three full days to pack what it took movers in Germany one day to pack. The moving company said they did not have a large enough shipping container to hold all of our stuff. It’s only 8,000 pounds, but somehow the shipping contract did not indicate that we actually had furniture.

The truck full of our stuff left our house in Toronto at about 4 p.m. on June 26, with no clear timeline as to how or when it would be put into a shipping crate, no specified delivery date and no contact information other than the guys who had packed us out.

We got our plane tickets a week before we were supposed to fly, via email from Ft. Drum. We made hotel reservations for our leave time in Florida two days before our vacation started.

Two and a half weeks later we flew out from Tampa to Atlanta, where we were supposed to catch our overnight flight to Stuttgart. We missed that flight thanks to bad weather and an unexpected refueling stop and had to stay overnight in Atlanta.

While I like to find the humor in everything, I have to admit that at this point it was pretty hard to laugh. Then again, what else could we do?

Finally, on June 18, almost exactly 54 weeks after we had left, we landed back in Germany. It was like we had gone on vacation but come back to the Twilight Zone. We no longer had a home, or any of our stuff, or our car and many of our friends had just moved.

We moved into base housing two weeks later, finished in-processing, enrolled the kids in school and other activities and my husband went to work. Things were finally getting back to normal.

Except that our car was still in Baltimore and our stuff was still in Toronto, sitting in the moving company’s warehouse.

Thank god for German beer!

The car was caught up in the IAL shipping debacle that many of you may have also experienced, although we lucked out in that it finally arrived only 24 days late. The unaccompanied baggage also arrived, a few days later than planned.

The household goods left Toronto 32 days after we did, and only after I spent hours on the phone tracking down their location and getting someone in a higher pay grade, as they say, to ensure they were being booked on a ship to Germany. Hopefully, they will arrive in the next few weeks. Or at least by Christmas.

In the end, though, does it really matter? It’s just stuff. My husband isn’t deployed, our family is together, and we are enjoying yet another tour of duty in Germany.

And I suspect this won’t be our last move from hell. 

Ted was anxious about moving away from home.

Granted, he was only going three hours away, but he had never known anything but his house, his bed and his mother, whom he lived with.

But the day had come, and off he went - his bed, dishes, prized toys and a picture of his mom and him in tow.

Plus, four, 50-pound bags of kibble and two giant trash-cans on wheels to hold it.

Ted clearly wasn’t going to starve.

But the beloved mutt’s life was going to be different. His owner, a sailor in the U.S. Navy, had set off on a long deployment.

And Ted had moved into a foster home.

Ted is one of many dogs displaced by deployment, loved by an active-duty service member owner and no one else at home to take care of him when the call to arms comes.

“In the perfect world, a family member that the dog knows can step in and care for the pets. When that isn’t possible, it’s an organization like Dogs on Deployment that can help,” said Carissa Marks, public relations director for Dogs on Deployment, a non-profit agency that finds homes for displaced dogs like Ted while their owners are serving overseas.

Marks recommends starting very early if you have a dog or cat you need fostered during deployment. Contact the agency as soon as you can to set up a profile and start getting your story out there to look for foster options.

“It may not be right away that someone sees your story,” she said.

Plus, if someone does volunteer, both you and they need to feel like the foster owners and home are a good fit for the pet.

She also recommends immediately purchasing pet insurance, if you don’t have it already. 

Without it, you can have a “whole lot of headaches if something unforeseen happens,” Marks added.

Then it’s time to prepare your pet.

Marks recommends allowing the pet to stay overnight and a few weekends with the foster owners. This allows the potential foster parents to familiarize themselves with the animal, too.

Also, take note of what items your dog or cat needs to be comfortable, Marks said.

When Ted finally moved in for the duration of the deployment, he even took the little stand his mother propped his food bowls on. And, he took a photo of himself with his owner, which his foster parents let him look at every day.  Sometimes, he even licked the glass, Marks said.

He also came with a “Ted Bible,” as they called it. Inside, his mother explained what treats he liked, what kind of bones he could have, what people food he enjoyed and what kinds to avoid. She even listed his fears and dislikes.

“Who would have thought that a German Shepard, husky cross would be terrified of lizards?” Marks said. “This may have seemed silly at first, but the first time this big, fuzzy dog came charging through the house ki-ya-ing at the top of his doggy lungs and launched into the poor guy’s lap? It was not silly anymore.”

Ted also had a new vet because even though he was just three hours away from his old one, it wasn’t close enough for an emergency.  His owner interviewed several before finding one she liked, and that info went into the ‘Ted Bible,” along with explanations of his previous care from his previous veterinarian.

She also made sure her best friend called and checked on Ted and his foster parents periodically during the deployment, to make sure he was happy and had enough food.

Finally, she left her father with pre-addressed envelopes and little gifts – gift cards for dinner out, for example – to show her thanks to the foster parents for caring for Ted so well.

Foster families who volunteer with Dogs on Deployment are not paid and often spend their own money on the animal’s treats and extras, because many are animal lovers themselves. The little thank-you’s that military owners send aren’t a “must-do” but a “want-to-do,” Marks said.

And pets often don’t have to go the full deployment without a visit from their parent. If FaceTime or Skype are available during a deployment, it’s a nice way to keep in touch with your dog or cat and their foster home, Marks said.

“My niece was keeping a friend’s dog while he was in Afghanistan last year.  The night he called, the dog was in the middle of having puppies. He got to be a part of it, and her tablet needed the screen cleaned from where the dog kissed it several times,” Marks said.

However, if you can’t see or speak with your pet, leaving them with worn T-shirts that smell like you can help, she said.

Sometimes, the unexpected happens, too.

“I know there was one case where a returning serviceman had a change of circumstances in life and was unable to keep their pet,” Marks said. “The boarder had fallen in love with dog and ended up adopting the pet.”

And sometimes, the worst can happen. There also can be unforeseen illnesses that require more vet care than the owner planned for. There could even be a situation when the dog needs to be put down, Marks added.

“Plan accordingly,” Marks said. “Assume nothing and everything. Include a directive for your pets, just in case.”

It’s happening.

Several years ago as the drawdown of American forces in Iraq became a reality, large non-profits began discussing the inevitable turn of public attention that would come with it. With no troops deployed to high profile locations, the donations, they feared, would dry up.

Leaders in the industries that help care for military families were right to be concerned. They knew that even though the deployment might be over, military families are far from over it, and in fact, may need more help than ever.

Now, the military itself is beginning to turn away and march on.

At the beginning of the Iraq War, the Army created hundreds of new civilian jobs as part of the family readiness support assistant program. These new hires were tasked with helping military units establish family readiness programs and provide support to volunteers, spouses and military members.

In some communities, these networks of support worked brilliantly. In others, they failed miserably.

Either way, by 2015, more than half of this support staff will be gone. Nearly 200 FRSAs will be pink-slipped by next year leaving one FRSA for every 1,000 FORSCOM soldiers, Northwest Military.com reported.

The reason is simple. Combat operations are drawing down. Thousands of soldiers too are being sent packing back to civilian life. The face of the Army is changing.

But the damage done by a decade of war has gone nowhere. In fact, many may argue, families are suffering more now than during any deployment.

And they may quickly find that there will be little help.

Major commands are rushing to train volunteers to fill the void left by paid FRSA staff members. Military families will be required to again rely only on each other in many situations.

When they look outside the gate for assistance, they may find none there either.

Private nonprofit groups that service military families exploded onto the scene in force between 2001 and 2012. Now nearly 7,800 organizations have registered with the federal government to help service members, reports The New York Times.

The effort is there, but the money is not. The Times reported that the non-profits cannot keep pace with the growing demands of caring for veterans and their families.

So, where will we go when the going gets tough? Who will help us in our darkest hours?

We will.

It’s time to take back our military neighborhoods, help, reach out, love each other and be present for all of our sisters in arms. Volunteer, take a younger spouse under your wing, sit and just listen.

The rest of the nation may have moved on, but we will forever have each other’s backs.

By Tiffany Shedd

After I earned my graduate degree in 2004, my thoughts were on finding a job or getting into a Ph.D. program. Little did I know, I was only a few days away from meeting my future husband and having my world, and my idea of home, completely rocked. Ten years later, we’ve crisscrossed the country as we PCSed from Fort Campbell, KY to Fort Wainwright, AK and back to the east coast to Fort Bragg, NC.

Our latest PCS brought us to Aberdeen Proving Grounds, MD. This was our toughest move. It was our shortest PCS, distance-wise, so you’d think it would have been a breeze. But, we had one major difference this time. Our son was born a week before my husband was to report for duty. And we were closing on our first home, which needed a lot of work before we could bring a newborn into it.

Luckily, we had a lot of help, and things went as smoothly as they could.

I came to motherhood later in life than most of my friends and most of the spouses I’ve met during my time as an Army wife. We were usually the odd couple out, because we didn’t have kids. It seemed like this made it tougher to meet and make friends with each move. I thought that our son would be our instant friend finder. What I found was that I was just too tired to even care about finding friends for the first year we were here.

During my son’s first year of life, everything seemed to go smoothly. We felt lucky compared to some of the horror stories we’d heard. He spoiled us by sleeping through the night at a month old (I mean from 7 p.m. until almost 7 a.m. most nights). He did seem to turn into a little monster while teething, but luckily, that only lasted a couple of weeks at a time.

My little man and I settled into our routines in our new home. Everything went along smoothly for almost a year. Then, one day, he didn’t respond to me in the way he normally did. He seemed to be in a daze. It didn’t last long, but it was odd. I was worried, but didn’t know what was causing this. He did this several times over the next couple of weeks.

My husband went TDY for a few weeks in August, so my little man, who’d just turned 10-months-old, and I went to visit my family. We were getting ready for the day and little man was crawling around, and then all of a sudden, he wasn’t. It was as if he’d forgotten how to crawl. He started crying, but then he was just limp and unresponsive. I immediately picked him up and tried to get him to respond. He snapped out of it after about 30 seconds.

I mentioned these episodes to his PCM on our next well baby visit. She did not seem too worried about them, but she did note them in her notes.

A month later, I was home alone again and my husband was TDY, again. Little man was crawling around, and all of a sudden, just flopped forward. He picked himself up but just flopped over again. I picked him up, thinking he was really ready for his nap. He had a thousand yard stare and stopped responding to my voice. His eyes got really wide and his muscles went rigid. Then, he started convulsing. His little body jerked violently and he stopped breathing. I have never felt more helpless in my entire life. I was not calm. I did not realize what I was witnessing. I just wanted my baby to be ok.

To make a very long and scary story short, after a rough couple of weeks and being admitted to the hospital several times, my son was diagnosed with epilepsy. With medication, we were able to get the seizures under control in about a month. Luckily, the medications work, and he has been seizure free for nearly seven months.

Once we had a diagnosis, our journey to getting our son into the Exceptional Family Member Program began. Funnily, my son’s PCM was one of the people responsible for getting the program started in the 1980s. She suggested that we get the process going, because sometimes it can take a while to get all of the paperwork filled out and processed. She also told us that the DD Form 2792, the official 13-page document you must fill out with your PCM, is a far cry from the original one page document.

I asked if we were required to enroll in the program and she said it is a mandatory enrollment program. If you’re like me, you may not like the feeling of being forced to participate in a program that you know little about. But with a little research and reassurance, I came to the conclusion that this was what was best for my son and our family.

According to the Army Medical Department, the EFMP is supposed to be a comprehensive, coordinated, multi-agency program that provides community support, housing, medical, educational and personnel services to military families with an EFM. Basically, this just means that if your spouse is given orders to some very remote post, without proper medical facilities within a reasonable distance, you and your child may not get the option of accompanying them. It’s a tough choice, but if you’re like me, you will do anything to make sure that your child receives the best and quickest medical attention possible.

We started this process in mid-April, and we’re still working on getting into the program. It takes time, and with budget cuts and understaffing issues, it takes more time. If your child needs to get enrolled, start early. Do not wait until a month before you need to PCS.

 I hope to be able to help some of you through this process as we try to get through it ourselves. I look forward to writing each month and helping other spouses by answering questions that you may not even know you had.

So here we are again, and it’s time to say, ‘See you later,’ to another blog. My sweet readers, you have become some of my closest friends over the last couple of years. You have seen me through some of my best and worst times and I have been happy to share those times with you. I am a firm believer in that we are stronger together than we are apart. I hope that reading through my adventures has made you feel like you have a friend who knows what you are going through.

I have to admit to you that, for many reasons, this has been probably the toughest transition I have endured in my 12 years as an Army spouse. Some of those reasons, I have shared with you and some of them, I have not. But there have been some dark days. I wasn’t sure if I could get out of bed. I didn’t want to face anyone. But I found something (or three somethings) that got me out of bed and kept me fighting for my sanity.

My struggle is large and overwhelming sometimes to me, but it pales in comparison to soldiers transitioning out of the Army. Just recently, we discovered that a dear friend of ours decided that he couldn’t take any more of his transition. From all accounts, things were not going well, and he chose to end his life. My soldier and I were devastated by the news, and as we speak to others about it, we hear people say, “I could have helped him get a job”, “If I had known, I would have invited him over to talk.” The truth is that when a person gets to that point, they may not ask for help. Change is hard and we don’t know where that breaking point might be.

I don’t tell you all of this to bring you down. I tell you all of this so that as you see your brothers/sisters in arms, friends and family going through a big transition, you will be in tune to their needs. He or she may not be willing to share the minutia of their issues, but you don’t have to know the particulars to be an encouragement and a source of strength.

Don’t ask for details. Listen to what they will tell you. Give them the sense that it is ok to have a meltdown in your presence without fear of judgment.

Above all, be encouraging. Dollars to donuts, they don’t want you to solve their problems. They just need an ear. You may be the person that shows them that they should believe in themselves.

Thank you for following along on my crazy journey. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for being my inspiration.

I will see you when I see you.

Much love and admiration . . . sby

I don’t know anyone who owns a map. 

Heck, I’m starting to think I don’t know anyone who owns a GPS that isn’t embedded in their car or their cell phone.

I’m not sure people read travel magazines anymore and I’ve never been in a visitor’s center along a highway chock full of people looking for brochures on what to do, where to eat and how long to drive til the next landmark.

And now, when you move to a new town, you don’t go to community meetings or the city’s welcome center looking for a new church, new take-out Chinese place or new pre-school for your kids. 

You ask on Facebook.

When we moved here just three years ago, I tentatively joined a Facebook group for wives married to sailors stationed at this tiny base and in this tiny town. I never posted, but lots of other people did.

They asked about everything under the sun: commissary hours; rates for drop-in childcare at the base daycare; what military housing was like for officers.

People made friends and got tips on that site all day long.

And here we are, three years later, and that Facebook group is still going strong.  Except it’s been joined by at least eight other groups, all for wives married to sailors stationed at this tiny base and in this tiny town.

In three years alone, the importance of Facebook – and its use as the main way military spouses get their information about, well, everything – has grown.

And so, sometimes, if you frequent those pages, you’ll see something rather odd come across your screen.

Like yesterday, when someone asked what they should do about their husband, who just after he was promoted, revealed to his wife that he was a cross-dresser.

I think I re-read the post 40 times to make sure that I was reading it correctly. And verify that this wasn’t some horrible joke.

But no. There it was plain as day. With her full name and photo attached to it. 

There’s been a big mess as of late that Facebook has overstepped privacy bounds; that they’ve gone too far with an app for cellular devices; that it’s dangerous how much information they put out there about Facebook users.

But what happens when the Facebook users put too much out there themselves?

Especially when it could affect their husbands’ careers? Their own credibility? Their public safety or the safety of those serving around them?

Social media makes it very easy to cross the line between personable and personal.  In fact, it seems we have created a chronic environment of over-sharing.

But for military spouses, it isn’t just a matter of embarrassing yourself.

It’s startling enough that it can set off a chain reaction that could alter personal and operational security.

And yet, the rest of the world is doing it.

But should we?
 

Editor’s Note: Salute to Spouses’ writer Samantha Carroll graduated college once - and went back years later to earn a second degree in nursing. Her return to campus was exhausting, thrilling and worth every moment. Please enjoy her personal story about going back to school and starting a brand new career.

Four years ago when I went back to school, I hurried to class, like many students each morning. But instead of rolling out of bed to get there in the nick of time after a long night of either studying or being with friends, I packed a diaper bag and left early in order to get my toddler to the babysitter’s on time. When I settled into my classroom, I reached into my shiny new book bag to retrieve my class materials and I discovered a Dora the Explorer doll and a random pacifier amongst my pens and folders. At age 34, I sat in a Psychology 101 class with students who were ten years younger than me and who were in college for the first time.

After eleven years of sales and marketing work, where I loosely used my journalism degree, I was bitten by the “nursing bug” and decided to return to school for a degree in nursing. That decision was easy. As the wife of a soldier, with a baby, maneuvering the decision to stop working full-time to return to class was the tricky part. Then, a move to Savannah and my husband’s very first deployment lit the proverbial fire underneath me and I learned to register for classes online, which I didn’t have to do the first time. I quickly became used to being an older, non-traditional student, as there were quite a few “second timers” like me, especially in the nursing program.

My husband was either deployed or away training for over half of my second college career. I credit Army family childcare, pre-school and my dear friends for helping me during my quasi-single parenting days, so that I could not only go to class but also study. I am not a person who can stay up late and do schoolwork once everyone is in bed. I never have been and I certainly applaud those who can do it. Once my daughter began kindergarten, I was in the home stretch. In addition to regular class time, tests and projects, I  had clinical time in the hospital that required me to leave my house before the crack of dawn, and once again, when my husband was away, my friends were nice enough to accept an additional kid at 5:45 a.m. to dress and drive to school along with their own children.

During my time in school, I was fortunate enough to not have to work. I had quite a few classmates who not only worked almost full-time but had families too. Again, my hat goes off to these amazing people. Right before my final year of nursing school, however, I acquired a part-time job at one of the local hospitals. The title was Student Patient Care Technician and I was hired based on having completed a minimal amount of nursing courses and the fact that I was still enrolled in a nursing program. The job consisted of entry level, non-licensed patient care like: bed baths, checking vital signs, changing beds and helping feed patients if necessary. It was a very flexible schedule. So flexible, I could choose my own hours and work as much or as little as I wanted. There were a minimal amount of shifts to work in a given time period, so I only worked the minimum. I took this position not only to better familiarize myself with the clinical setting but also to use as a networking tool. This particular hospital is always hiring new nursing graduates and the more areas I could work in, and the more people I could meet, the better the job prospects.

One day, about three months before graduation, I was assigned to work in the Orthopedic Trauma unit. It was extremely busy and the staff were all very nice and helpful and I felt an instant synergy with them. At my shift’s end, they asked me to come back the next time I worked, and when it came time for my final semester of nursing school when we chose an area to work with for ten shifts with a nurse preceptor, to my delight, I was able to do my clinical hours in that unit. Not long into my program, the nurse manager asked if I was interested in receiving an early job offer. Of course I was and I accepted. I later found out that my work as a student tech was what inspired that early offer.

After graduation, and two grueling weeks of studying for the NCLEX (National Council Licensure Exam,) I passed and began my nurse residency program. I had not worked full-time in a while and the first two weeks was harder to get used to than I thought. I was exhausted at the end of each day. But, in that program, I was surrounded by 87 newly licensed nurses just like me. It was great to be go through the information overload and anticipation of what’s to come with others. I’ve recently begun my 12-hour shifts with a nurse preceptor and I got the night shift rotation first. Since I’m not a night person, this has proven to be particularly challenging for me and I’m certainly glad it’s only for four weeks. And, big surprise, my husband is out of town for a month.

 My personality type somehow thrives upon challenge. I am, after all, an Army wife. It’s funny, I never set out to be an orthopedic nurse. I was content letting my nurse specialty find me once I knew I wanted to set out on this journey. In spite of the kid drop offs, diapers and books, the stress of simultaneously studying for tests and preparing for deployments and homecomings, I feel as though I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. And when I think back to the afternoons when I opened my psychology book and found a Dora flashcard on page 163, and even now when I’m exhausted but have to make myself sleep during the day and my daughter is with a friend and my husband is on the other side of the country, I stop and ask myself, “Was it all worth it?”

You bet it was!

My son is only in sixth grade, but he’s deeply embroiled in the “what to do when I grow up” debate. It’s no surprise to us that the boy who devours biographies of world leaders, prefers History Channel documentaries to cartoons and owns thousands of historically accurate tin soldiers is leaning toward studying military history or archeology.

We want him to excel in a field that he loves. We want him to be able to find a job that fuels his passion, not just his checkbook. But, he also is going to have to buy his own food someday. And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t concerned about how many history buffs the economy really has jobs waiting for.

So, quietly, I have been checking out the job market for history buffs like my son. So far, it’s not exactly pretty.

Which led me to another search, what should students be studying to secure their place in the workforce? Where exactly are the jobs?

U.S. News and World Report has ranked the 100 best jobs based on hiring demand, potential growth in demand over the next 10 years, salary, stress level and work-life balance.

Sadly, historian is nowhere on that list. But a lot of other jobs are. Including house painter at number 100 and software developer at number 1. In between there are a lot of jobs, including a majority in the healthcare and engineering fields.

So, are you walking through those classroom doors next month with undecided checked next to your major? You may want to check this list out. It may help you find the perfect job that gives you, and kids like my son, plenty of time to tend to your hobbies and earn a paycheck.

One thing I have continuously been working at as a military spouse has been asking for help. Since I have had children, I have had to own that fact that I cannot do it all. And sometimes, it’s ok to ask for help.

I used to try to schedule appointments around my husband’s work schedule. But I am sure you all understand how not easy that is; Trainings change, schedules are always shifting, trips pop up or get canceled last minute.

I hate to admit it, but I just don’t take my husband’s schedule into account most of the time. I remember being sad during my son’s first year of life because he couldn’t come with us to all the monthly appointments like other dads. But, I learned to tackle the questions and soothe the vaccination cries by myself. I quickly mastered the art of taking two kids to the doctors even though it was stressful and left all three of us in tears sometimes. Friends offered to help I hated accepting their offers.

So, getting back to asking people for help - with no family here, friends become your family and as much as I hate having to ask, sometimes you just have to suck it up and do it.

Like I did, last week.

Even though my husband was home, I had to step outside my comfort zone and ask for help because I did not have a choice. I was in a minor car accident with my children (don’t worry we are all fine!). But as military luck would have it, my husband was in a building where he could not bring his cell phone and I did not know that at the time. This was my first emergency as a parent and even though my Marine was home, I could not reach him.

As I stood on the side of the road, holding my 2-year-old who wanted to run into traffic, I tried to search my phone for a number of someone who works with my husband who could get in contact with him. Surely, I had to have someone’s number. I made a note to save an office number the last time he traveled out of the country but it was nowhere to be found.

I think this is where a little panic set it once I realized everyone was ok.  In my mind, I knew I could call my husband and he would answer and come save us and we would be fine! And even though my children and I were okay (my car was a different story) my emotions started to build.

My car was not drivable and we were 20 minutes from our home. The police and the mechanic from the tow truck company asked where they should take the car and how we would get home.

I guess this would be a good place to admit that I have trouble making decisions. The tow truck needed to know where to tow the car. I have never been in an accident before. Doesn’t this kind of stuff fall under the husband category? I cook, clean and raise children. I wasn’t prepared for this situation.  

During a deployment, sure this could probably happen. But he is home and I did not have my solo mom game face on. The police officers offered to take us to the station where we could wait until we could get a ride home, but I wasn’t prepared for a day stranded at the police station. I had no idea when I would finally reach my husband. And who could I call to pick us up? My friends all had kids of their own and couldn’t possibly fit us in their cars with them. How do I manage this?